Entertainment

Fantasy Football Is Heroin.

Sit or Start Fantasy Football

 

No hyperbole. I’m coming off one of the most stressful games in my fantasy football life and I think I probably got 6 different types of panic disorders. Fantasy football is literally heroin, it ruins your life but there’s no way you can stop playing. Just not possible folks.

I started out my season 0-3, it’s nearly impossible to come back down 0-3 in fantasy. But, just like the Red Sox and David Roberts, I stole Carson Wentz off my waivers and then he destroyed everyone. I was killing it, Zeke was beating his suspension, now I am on the way back. Zeke finally gets the kick to the nuts, and now I lose him till week 15.

Not fucking good. I still came back despite that, I got Josh Gordon off the wire, Jermaine Kearse, I still had Alfred Morris, and Keenan Allen caught every TD in sight. I was rolling and destroying everyone while other teams fell. I needed a win this week to get in, and a loss from one of two teams to get in. An hour ago, I was up 88-58. Then, Wentz tore his fucking ACL, I’m playing against Gurley who rushed for a TD. Then, Russell Wilson decides to throw 2 touchdowns in the fourth, one for 61 yards, and one for 74.

All within 20 minutes this happened. Now, I have just the Ravens defense left, and my opponent has James White and Chris Boswell, he’s up by 1 point. Not to mention, Keenan Allen got tackled at the goal line and didn’t score, and Kelce got a TD called back. I once lost in the first round of a season where i was 13-1, because shady McCoy got hurt, and Javorius Allen had -0.04 points in an entire game. To top it off, I lost on a garbage time 1 yard TD by Ben Watson in the Monday night game. Every fucking season this shit happens to me, I feel like I’m on the worst trip ever off a bad dose of Heroin because this blog was written all on venom. Fuck Fantasy football, I can’t wait till next year.

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Categories: Entertainment, NFL

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